30 Oct The Fear of Missing Out and Missing Home Instead
When it comes to travel, I have an underlying fear of missing out. It is such a great big beautiful world, and I wish to see as much of it as possible before my time upon it ends. I want to experience its richness, meet its people, learn its languages, taste its food and savour its wine. I intentionally planned a few extra days at the end of the Camino just in case I needed more time in Porto.
The Camino was a wonderful and difficult experience. I proved to myself that I am capable, I can push myself further than I thought possible, and I am adaptable. My inner introvert can survive with 20-30 other people sleeping in the same room (ear plugs and a sleep mask are essential though!). I am immensely grateful for the opportunities I had to experience so much of Portugal and Spain.
I have been travelling for the past 27 days. Tonight is my last evening in Porto and I can’t wait to get home. I miss my partner. His warmth, his smile, the touch of his skin on mine. I miss the hills and lochs of Scotland. And I even miss the cold! (It’s been quite warm in Spain and Portugal this past week).
“The pleasure we derive from journeys is perhaps dependent more on the mindset with which we travel than on the destination we travel to. If only we could apply a travelling mindset to our own locales, we might find these places becoming no less interesting …” – Alain de Botton, The Art of Travel
I want to learn more about Islay. Explore her beaches, walk her roads and trails, discover more of her history. I love looking out our kitchen window and seeing the majestic Paps of Jura filling the horizon. Or stepping out onto the porch and gazing across Loch Indaal towards the Oa. I find the scenery absolutely fascinating. It is constantly changing, and always stunning (okay, sometimes the low cloud/mist/rain means you can’t actually see anything, but I’m sure it’s still pretty underneath all that).
My other home calls too. I return to Melbourne at the end of November for 3 months. Roddy is coming too for a few weeks! I can’t wait to show him ‘my’ city. I love Melbourne. The more I travel the more I realise how much it has to offer. Melbourne is a wonderful mix of many different cultures and influences. You can find almost every food-stuff, no matter how ‘foreign’. My folks live in the Yarra Valley, only an hour outside of Melbourne, and it is a simply stunning spot. I can’t wait to explore my home town again, and try to see anew the places I’ve ‘known’.
Friedrich Nietzsche wrote (per the The Art of Travel) “in the end we are tempted to divide mankind into a minority (a minimality) of those who know how to make much of little, and a majority of those who know how to make little of much.”
I would hate to leave this world having seen as much as I could, and yet not having seen much of it at all. That truly is a worthy fear – having not really been present for your own life.